The Mother
“My 10 year old daughter came to me one day and asked, "mommy, how come you don’t go out to work and don’t have a job? like other moms?”
I had always debated within myself what the perfect age would be to have this conversation with her. To explain to her that one day, like me, she will be faced with the difficult decision between delegating her motherly duties in order to pursue a career outside the home, or to take a pause, to be present for her children. But at 10, I didn't think I was ready for this, but here she was, waiting for an answer. The possibility that somewhere in her mind, the notion that what I did for a living defined my value as a women, her mother, made that conversation a difficult one to delve into.
But when would be the ideal time? When does she actually starts to make decisions that will lead to her career and life choices? How will her perception of my being a stay at home mom, for more than a decade, influence her decisions?
Being a mother is a calling, and a full time job.
I didn’t choose to be a stay-at-home mom, but when I found myself at a cross-road, I was forced to reevaluate my priorities and my values.
I first left employment in July of 2014, and then later, more permanenty, in 2017 to focus on raising my two children, Dave and Maryanne.
Growing up, I thought that I wanted a large family. After. Getting married and having my first son, I soon realised that the responsibility was way beyond my romanticized view of motherhood. Trying to adjust to my new reality both physically and mentally took a toll on my body. It is actually not until Dave’s first birthday, that I began to enjoy motherhood. That is when I realised that I had accomplished something big – I had kept a human alive for 12 good months! A year is what it took for me to get over the tussle with grand-parents over my diet and baby’s diet, and for the fear of “not knowing what I was doing, to dissipate.
Over the years, I have acknowledged that giving birth to my son and daughter, didn’t make me their mother. It is choosing to parent them daily, that makes me their mother.
I am passionate about the family unit modelled by the Body of Christ. As a Children’s Leader in Bible Study Fellowship (BSF), I nurture and mentor children through Christian teachings in the context of their day-to-day lives. I also hosted the the Green Park Mavuno Church Children’s church in my home for the first two years before the Church found a permanent home.
As part of my contribution to shape my Children's academic development, I served as the Chairperson of the Parents and Teachers Association (PTA) of the Nairobi Academy (2018-2019) and continue to serve as a member to date.
